The New York Times called it “a watershed moment for the #MeToo movement.”[1] One year ago today, Harvey Weinstein was sentenced to twenty-three years in prison after being convicted of two felony sex crimes.[2]
In an unusual cultural moment, Christians and non-Christians and conservatives and liberals agree: Our society has a sexual brokenness to it.
And the problem is widespread. The Center for Disease Control reports that “more than one in three women and nearly one in four men have experienced sexual violence involving physical contact at some point in their lives.”[3]
I’m glad that the sexism and sexual harassment that was once tolerated is coming to the light, but that’s not enough. It’s good to bring sexual harassment to justice, but there’s a deeper problem, and it can’t be solved merely through litigation.
The Problem
The creators of Tesla’s Model X car built into its operating system some hidden features.[4] For example, if you push autopilot four times in a row, the display turns into rainbow road from Mario Kart. If you enter 007, the menu will show you James Bond’s submarine. We know about these features because the creators told us. They know how it works because they’re the ones who designed it.
God created us, and God created sex. He knows how it's designed to work. Sex was created for one man and one woman to share in the context of marriage (Genesis 2:24; Matthew 19:5). The root cause of the sexual brokenness in our society is that we’ve ignored God’s design. And studies confirm this.
Twenty-three percent of cohabitating adults say they’re living together because they want to test the relationship,[5] but studies show that cohabitating before marriage increases your odds of divorce.[6] And a recent Pew Research study found that married couples also have higher levels of relationship satisfaction and trust than non-married cohabitating couples.[7]
Studies also confirm the harmful effects of pornography. Porn can increase depression, anxiety, and social problems.[8] The porn industry fuels sex trafficking, and often pornography is sex trafficking.[9] Consumers of violent and nonviolent pornography are more likely to use their words, drugs, or alcohol to coerce others into sex.[10] And using pornography increases aggressive behavior, including having violent fantasies and actually committing violent assaults.[11] Yet 68% of Gen Z believe pornography is morally acceptable.[12]
We’re right to condemn sexual abuse, but we can’t do so while at the same time saying pornography is ok. The two are not so separated.
Studies confirm what the Bible has said for thousands of years. Sexual immorality—by the Bible’s definition—is not good for anyone. It’s not good for us, and it’s not good for society.
God’s Commands Are Freeing
A couple years ago my wife and I went camping in the Adirondacks, and there were certain rules we had to follow. For one, we had to bring a bear canister with us to store all our food in at night. And if you’ve ever had to carry a bear canister, you know it’s a bit annoying. They’re these big, bulky things that don’t fit well in your backpack, and they’re not light either. We also couldn’t make a campfire. And that was especially disappointing, because we were really looking forward to having one, and we thought we’d be able to.
These rules seemed a bit irritating, but they were ultimately for our good. They protected us and others from bears and from forest fires.
Similarly, the commands in the Bible are not given for our hardship or suffering. They’re given for our good. They tell us how we’re meant to live. “The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body” (1 Corinthians 6:13).
God’s commands are not hateful. They’re deeply loving. His commands are not ultimately self-denying. They’re ultimately self-fulfilling. They’re not oppressive. They’re freeing!
The reason why Christian sexuality is so offensive is because it says God knows what’s best for you. And that may be different than what we think is best for ourselves. The solution to the sexual brokenness in our society is not to create our own standards. The solution is to conform to God’s standard.
Freed to Flee
But there’s a problem. None of us have kept God’s design for sex. Jesus says, “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matthew 5:27-28).
Even if we haven’t done what Weinstein did, we're all contributing to the sexual brokenness of our society. We may not be found guilty before a jury of our peers, but we all stand condemned before God. But there’s good news.
“But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.” (1 Corinthians 6:11).
If you have faith in Christ, you are no longer considered a sexually immoral person. That’s past tense for you. “Such were some of you” (1 Corinthians 6:11). In a very real way, that is not who you are any longer. Christ has freed you from those sins.
And since we have been freed from them, let us not continue in them. Let us not celebrate them. Let us not tolerate them in our lives. Let us flee these sins. “Flee from sexual immorality” (1 Corinthians 6:18). You have been freed from sin to flee from sin. That’s the solution to the sexual brokenness in our society.
We flee things that are dangerous. The Bible doesn’t say that sex outside of marriage or pornography or lust is fun, but we really shouldn't do it. The Bible says it’s dangerous! When there’s a forest fire and the authorities tell you to evacuate, you don’t sit back and enjoy a nice cup of coffee. You evacuate! Jesus is crying out to you, letting you know there is a fire. Don’t just sit there while the fire grows around you. And certainly don’t walk back towards the fire. Run for your life!
Now practically, fleeing sexual immorality might mean giving up some of your other freedoms. It might mean establishing boundaries with your girlfriend or boyfriend. It might mean setting up filters on your computer and phone and finding someone with whom you can be honest with about your struggles. If you’re a parent, this might mean having age-appropriate conversations with your kids about sex. It might mean exposing the lies of sexualized advertising in conversations with them.
Flee to Christ
And if I’m fleeing a forest fire, it matters where I’m fleeing to. It’s no good to me if I flee one section of the fire by heading straight toward another. In the same way, when we’re fleeing sin, it matters where we’re fleeing to. We have to flee to Christ.
Part of fleeing from sin is pursuing God. It also means cultivating healthy relationships with friends, and if you’re married, with your spouse. If we want to avoid disease, we eat healthy and exercise. One of the best ways to avoid sexual immorality is by developing godly relationships. They’re the diet and exercise that keep you from disease.
Society is healed and made more just when God frees his people from sexual immorality and society follows God’s design for sex. Fleeing is the way forward.
[1] https://www.nytimes.com/2020/02/24/nyregion/harvey-weinstein-trial-rape-verdict.html [2] https://www.nytimes.com/2020/03/11/nyregion/harvey-weinstein-sentencing.html [3] https://www.cdc.gov/injury/features/sexual-violence/index.html [4] https://www.cnet.com/pictures/tesla-easter-eggs/ [5] www.pewsocialtrends.org/2019/11/06/marriage-and-cohabitation-in-the-u-s [6] https://ifstudies.org/blog/premarital-cohabitation-is-still-associated-with-greater-odds-of-divorce [7] www.pewsocialtrends.org/2019/11/06/marriage-and-cohabitation-in-the-u-s [8] https://fightthenewdrug.org/why-porn-leaves-consumers-lonely [9] https://fightthenewdrug.org/how-porn-fuels-sex-trafficking/ [10] https://fightthenewdrug.org/how-consuming-porn-can-lead-to-violence/ [11] Ibid. [12] https://www.barna.com/research/porn-in-the-digital-age-new-research-reveals-10-trends/
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